Top Ten Reasons to Forgive the Stepmom, the Ex-Wife, or Your Ex

A handful of flower petals

1. Your grievances live inside you long after the event has passed, which feels terrible.

2. Your grudges don’t actually improve the outcome of future problems.

3. You’re inadvertently “leaking” your resentment onto innocent bystanders.

4. It’s possible to forgive... and still create healthy boundaries that protect you from future pain and unhappiness.

5. When you truly forgive another from the heart, forgiving yourself for ways that you might have enabled your transgressor goes hand in hand.

6. You’re modeling compassion and understanding for your children and stepchildren.

7. You are freer to concentrate on the things that really matter in life, like cat videos or your latest YouTube obsession.

8. The Victim Tango broken record from hell stops playing in your brain. Ahh, sweet peace and quiet!

9. Forgiving the other person isn’t like them getting the upper hand, because you’ve actually stepped out of the gladiators arena altogether.

10. Through maturity and humility, you can now admit that you’ve hurt people too— sometimes by accident, and at other times, not. We all deserve to be given the benefit of the doubt, while shouldering the appropriate consequences of our actions.

What are your thoughts?

Jennifer Newcomb

My mission: to help people live happier, more creative lives through failing forward. I’m the author of of two books on collaborative divorced family relationships and three on productive creativity. 

https://www.jennifernewcomb.com
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The High-Conflict Ex

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What Divorced Moms Should Know About Stepmoms